There have been a lot of different themes running through my brain lately. One is that I've been craving simplicity. I read Lava Lady's blog, and I have craving to be able to bake things to share with the people that I love...to have someone make me breakfast...to have an evening at home just curled up on the couch watching a movie with someone I care about next to me.
I recognize that some of this is the old I-want-a-partner feeling, but I remember fondly the years that I lived in intentional community, or had multiple roommates. Just the simple joy of having someone to talk about your day with when you get home.
I remember the last large house that I lived in in DC. There was a lot of conflict and chaos in that house, but I also have some of the fondest memories of my life in DC from there. There was the adventure of watching the summer Olympics on a television without sound (we would frequently turn on the classic radio station to accompany it). Having parties and dancing in the living room. Laughing over the latest candidate for roommate (there seemed to be a revolving door and we were always interviewing for new housemates).
Maybe that doesn't sound simple, but we ate a lot together. We were always together in some way. Evenings we might just sit out on the porch and smoke (until I quit that year, anyway).
That's what I miss. I schedule appointments to see my friends these days and I guess that I just want to not have to schedule appointments with someone. I want to be able to have regular contact with someone.
Reading over this post, I'm struck with how it is that I equate simplicity with companionship. Maybe because I work so hard to fill up my life with things and activities to fend off loneliness. I guess today, it's just not working.