Sometimes I have to get beyond my angst at having no dates/partner and the situation that this country has itself in and all the little things like overwhelming debt and the numbing grind of daily work to think about the things in my life that are light and good.
Yesterday, having dinner with my friend B, I realized how good it was to have a friend that I could just be comfortable with. I'm blessed with many such friends - some have commented here...Lisa, Kara, Hippy Chick, writinginAK, and others who read (or don't) without comment. But here's the thing about these friends of mine - they are people with this incredible capacity to let me be myself.
A simple thing, one would think, but I have had any number of experiences in which I have been required by the person I am with or by myself to be something other than who I am. In some ways, I chose jobs that don't let me show who I am to other people...and I know that I do this well, this hiding of myself. It's a way I've had of "ensuring" that I would not be left alone because I may have thought I was unloveable for any number of reasons. It actually took my therapist laughing in my face (well, she was more gentle about it than that) to make me realize that I wasn't a boring person.
These people, my friends, range across this crazy country. Some have worked with me, some have lived with me, some went to school or just played with me. And they are incredible people...here's some of the things they do in their work lives: social worker, director of a women's organization, MD, RN, lawyer, graphic designer, stay-at-home mother of 3, project assistant, CPA, development director for a charter school, web design...if you don't see yourself here, it is only because my memory is thwarted by this Thursday morning.
They are an incredibly talented and successful bunch, and I love them for all that they give to me and the shared experiences that we have had.
On a last note - It's constantly amazing how often it is, when attending large celebratory gatherings for friends, that I discover that my friend's friends are wonderful people as well.
P.S. Someday I shall wax poetic about this strange phenomenon of blogsters, but this post is dedicated to the IRL friends out there...
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3 comments:
You're pretty incredible yourself!!!
Kara
I love it when I'm with people that i can totally just be me around. just me, warts n' all.
That's what friends are for, eh?
Great post, and right back at you! i certainly appreciate all of the friends that I don't have to put on an "appropriate" display for and I can just be silly, serious, or any other thing I feel like at a particular momment. Thanks for the refresher during a tough week.
Lisa
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