Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Choice

How much are you aware of the choices you make in your life?

The theme of my group last night was Choice or Chance. I know that it was hard for me to hear or accept the idea that I was choosing to be single. Mostly because, while I had made that choice for awhile in my life, I also knew that I had consciously made a choice to pursue relationships that didn't work out as well.

I think that the difficulty, when we talk about what we choose for ourselves in our lives is that it seems to indicate that chance plays no role. And there is chance in our world...we didn't choose, for instance, when or where we would be born (or if we did, we don't remember it). We didn't choose how our parents would act or the kinds of patterns we would be taught.

We can, of course, choose to change patterns later. We can choose to move or live or act in different ways. I, actually, believe that we can change our beliefs about ourselves and our world...but those choices are not easy ones and the path they lead you down can be really difficult and often does not come with a map.

Last night, I ended the group by pointing out that we always have choice in our lives and we need to stay aware of that. I added that, of course, no one ever promised that those choices would be good ones.

2 comments:

shorty said...

Great post, gives me a lot to think about...maybe I could get on a mailing list of what you talk about in your classes.

Sounds like you are having up and down days too as of late....hang in there constistancy will come shortly, I think.

Aravis said...

This concept is one that we are taught in AA as well. We can't always choose what happens around us, but we can choose how we respond. Happiness, too, is a choice. I have to admit though that it doesn't come naturally to me to find the positive and focus on it rather than dwell in the negative and react adversely. I'm working on it, but I'm afraid I'm just human after all.