This weekend felt a bit anticlimactic. I don't know why really. Perhaps, the anxiety of last week felt like it was building up to something dramatic. But, nope, no drama.
Thursday night, S and I hung out together. It was good and I really felt reassured by him and very connected. On Friday, I had my therapy. I wasn't feeling like I wanted to be there much, especially because I was having guilt for cancelling the previous week. I was sick, but I was still feeling guilt. Gotta love the way my brain works, eh?
I met up with S again on Friday night and we went to see The Death of a Salesman. Wow is that play depressing! Willy is a classic narcissist. He can't see beyond himself...in fact, he can't even really see who he is. It was hard to watch the play to see them all struggling so much. What saved the experience was sitting in the car afterwards and talking about it with S. We had very different perspectives. It was fun to explore that.
Saturday, after seeing clients and taking a nap, I went to help ExecutiveDirector move. Amazingly, I got there just as they were finishing up, so I got to have some baby holding time and have a nice chat with her mom. I went home and cooked dinner, then went to bed early.
Sunday, S and I headed over to one of my former Women's Therapy Center colleague's house for a brunch. It was good to meet some new people, but challenging at the same time. I sometimes have a hard time mixing with people that I don't know and it was a bit tiring. The group was off for a hike from there.
Although I'm gaining strength and stamina, I am still not the fastest hiker and I have to take more frequent breaks than others. So by the time we'd walked to the park, the group had already outpaced S and I and we lost them. I was very frustrated by this and worried that S would be angry. He wasn't, of course, but I project things all over the place when I don't feel like I'm at the same level as others.
Anyway, we had a lovely hike in Tilden and we stopped at the Little Farm to pet the animals before hiking back. I get hot very easily and the day was warm and I started to get a headache (as I sometimes do). It wasn't too bad just then but when I got in the car and we started to drive, it got a little worse.
We stopped for dinner at a place called the Hotel Mac in Pt. Richmond. It was nummy, but coming out of the restaurant into the sun sent my head pounding. We ended up spending about half an hour in the car until my Advil kicked in. I felt nauseous and in pain.
Finally, it let up enough to feel comfortable sitting up and driving, so we headed off for a gentle adventure. We drove around Pt Richmond and the Richmond shipyards a bit. We found the Wapama an old wood hulled steamer that is on a barge and waiting restoration. And we saw the SS Red Oak Victory.
I dropped S off at home, then went home and basically just fell into bed. I was asleep early. I'm going to have to bite the bullet with this headache thing and go to see my doctor. Hopefully, she'll have some ideas as to what's going on.