Thursday, August 17, 2006

"I scream, you scream..."

Out of great love for you, my friends, I give this warning: DO NOT EVER buy Hagen Daz's Mayan Chocolate icecream. Well, perhaps, the "ever" is a little extreme. If you do buy this icecream, it should be under circumstances in which you will be sharing it at a party or some such. It is a tricksy little treat, I tell thee, which sucks the willpower out of a person.

I made the mistake of buying it last night - Safeway had conspired with Hagen Daz for it to be on sale, therefore cheaper than even the beloved Ben & Jerry's. I had bought it one other time, but apparently it also gives you some sort of amnesia about the past times you have consumed it until after you have it again. It's a good thing I'm temporarily out of it's grasp this morning.

This is what happens: the pint is opened and the first spoonful is dipped into the container and brought to the mouth. Then the combined flavors of chocolate and cinnamon and the cold creamy texture take you in and cradle your brain. You eat how much you intended, and may even, in that moment, be able to put the container away in the freezer.

But the icecream is already working on you. In the back of your nose is the perfume of cinnamon. On your tongue is the memory of the smooth sweetness of rich chocolate and it calls to you. You decide to take it out for just a few more bites, and a few more, and a few more...until you find yourself trying to lick the bottom of the container with your tongue.

This has happened both times I've purchased it. It's satan's icecream!

7 comments:

Hippy Chick said...

See? I told you that lady next door was secretly working for Haagen Dazs!

Charby said...

*makes mental note of the name*

Ethel said...

Um, I am so buying some of this as soon as humanly possible.

beedragon said...

mmmmm... ice cream :)

P'tit-Loup said...

As the little church lady would have said "Could it be . . . SAAATANNNN!" Sounds heavenly though, and I will look it up the next time I have a party as my willpower against chocolate is very low!

Pynchon said...

Satan's ice cream? That would be the Bailey's ice cream. I ate a whole tub of that once and woke up with a nuclear hangover.

Aravis said...

I've rarely eaten the stuff but they're so good they can make me devour vanilla ice cream, which I usually find rather boring. It's a good thing they concentrate on ice cream; if they turned focused their talents elsewhere they could probably take over the world!

Okay, maybe not.